5 Great Ways To Strengthen A Relationship After Discovering Porn Addiction

January 4, 2021

The devastation that comes with discovering a porn addiction is often unexplainable. Likewise, learning your spouse has a porn addiction can lead to so many questions. Why? When? Where? How? Like many other things, the status of your relationship may no longer be clear. Is it possible to move forward together after such a major violation of trust? Can the relationship be strengthened after such a life-changing bombshell?

The decision to remain in your relationship and move forward together is one that some couples make. Likewise, there's no right or wrong choice; it's ultimately up to the two of you. Although the journey is difficult, it is possible to heal and regain trust within the relationship.

In this article, we'll provide 5 great ideas that may help you strengthen your relationship after discovering a porn addiction.

How Does Porn Addiction Affect the Relationship?

There are many ways a porn addiction can affect a relationship. Like any addiction, there are often many lies and secrets intertwined in the behaviors of addiction. That alone can lead to broken trust and heartache. Likewise, porn addiction can cause rewiring in the brain. As such, that can affect the relationship in a variety of ways. For example, there are likely damaging effects on intimacy within the relationship. Usually, there's a distortion between sexual fantasy and reality, which affects the relationship.

Then, there's the discovery of an addiction that can create another set of issues. Finding out about an addiction can feel like a bombshell. As a result, it can shatter trust in an instant. The feeling of betrayal can leave you with symptoms similar to those of PTSD. Likewise, it can lead to frustration, accusations, and an abundance of distress within the relationship.

However, the good news in all of this is through dedication and hard work, couples can heal. Porn addiction recovery is achievable. Furthermore, strength and trust within the relationship are attainable.

5 ways to strengthen a relationship after discovering an addiction

  1. Set boundaries. Setting boundaries can be a great way to begin to restore trust. Likewise, boundaries can create a safety net, especially when clear consequences accompany them. Examples could include:

    • Require apps and website access to be deleted. This could include allowing you to change passwords to the app store and specific accounts on all electronic devices.
    • Identify places where electronics are not allowed. (bathrooms, behind locked doors, etc.)
    • Access to phone, texts, or other electronics upon request
    • Specific physical or emotional space
    • Attend and participate in treatment or 12-step program
  2. Seek support and treatment. Porn addiction comes with a complex set of issues. However, with treatment and support, you can increase the likelihood of both healing and recovery.
  3. Be transparent. Answers to questions will require transparency for effective healing to take place. Likewise, healing can be more authentic through complete transparency.
  4. Self-care. When you're spinning in anger and grief, it can be difficult to eat, sleep, and interact with others. Through self-care, you can focus on getting enough sleep, eating nutritiously, and getting yourself ready for the day. Furthermore, self-care can help you to acknowledge the emotions you're feeling. In other words, self-care may contribute to your mental health and your relationship.
  5. Plan together. Healing and rebuilding trust is going to take time, effort, and commitment. Furthermore, a plan of action is likely to be more effective if both of you are involved in the process.

Discovering a spouse's porn addiction is likely to be life-changing. Like isn't likely to return to normal. However, if both of you want your relationship to remain intact, we may be able to help. At Paradise Creek Recovery Center, we help those with porn addictions through the recovery process. Call us today to learn more.

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